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tox
When the impossible happens, challenge your assumptions and the correct answers will flow

Eric @tox

Age 33, Male

Trucker/HD mechanic

Polytech/Uni/Coll

Calgary Alberta

Joined on 3/13/07

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tox's News

Posted by tox - June 8th, 2010


bullets to fly
graves to dig
men to fall, and tears too sweet
these hands will tell tales
of bloodshed and pain
written in red
and drown in blood
~~~
shotgun in hand
i bust down the door
cards fly up and pistols out far
2 shells go out and 5 bullets return
2 men are dead, and i stand alone
pain overwhelming
and dripping to the ground
my pride is broken twice...
mid chest and collar bone
~~~
last breath on earth is pure with life
and stretching to the end, that cannot come
we all die now
only to wake up in white beds
... at least i woke
~~~
some men carry on, some just fill space
others will be on display in a different place
doctors all around and police stand aside
i did the impossible
i took two lives
buried with honors
while i stand with shame
life and death so simple
when a gun gets a hand


Posted by tox - June 6th, 2010


dear ass crumb.. ur good now :)
i totally lied, go away


Posted by tox - June 2nd, 2010


dear mods.. if you are reading this then this is the fallout of a ... "good sport" sort of duel between me and ass-crumb, i will soon change it, but just for the shits and giggles, i will be keeping it up for a while :)

dead Ass-Crumb
pile of stinking shit
fucking die
~~ Haiku to Ass-Crumb 3-5-3

i wake this morning with shit on my screen
Ass-Crumb was here and he hit the fan screen
not able to make it up and to the wind
he tried again but only found pain
the blades were turning
and sucked him in
he covers the wall now
Ass-Crumb you fucking shit stain
i hate you now in this fit of rage
emotion and anger fill my veins
pump through my heart and straight through my brain
Ass-Crumb you fucking shit stain
~~Rhyme poem to Ass-Crumb

Ass-Crumb i hate you
my poetry is better
nothing but asshole
tarnish your name i have done
hate you till the end of time
~~Tanka poem to Ass-Crumb 5-7-5-7-7


Posted by tox - May 25th, 2010


alone in my room

alone in the dark
alone in my heart
tears to come one day
but tonight i am without
their cold hand in me
some will see, but less will view
the beauty of this world and the music i view
the music we make, it flows through me now
the beat, oh the beat
it plays like a wind swept sheet on a hot august night
tears tonight for the beat that i play, for the love of this earth for the music in me
i dance this night for the sake on the flame, for the love of the dark for the beat in my heart
come to dance, or come to watch, i can spin my feet for the people that can not speak
for the people that lie cold, for the people that believe in their sleep
but come and hang out, and we can share the dark beat
there is plenty to go around
when i sit here
music loud
in the dark, it makes me proud


Posted by tox - April 28th, 2010


alone in my room

alone in the dark
alone in my heart
tears to come one day
but tonight i am without
their cold hand in me
some will see, but less will view
the beauty of this world and the music i view
the music we make, it flows through me now
the beat, oh the beat
it plays like a wind swept sheet on a hot august night
tears tonight for the beat that i play, for the love of this earth for the music in me
i dance this night for the sake on the flame, for the love of the dark for the beat in my heart
come to dance, or come to watch, i can spin my feet for the people that can not speak
for the people that lie cold, for the people that believe in their sleep
but come and hang out, and we can share the dark beat
there is plenty to go around
when i sit here
music loud
in the dark, it makes me proud


Posted by tox - March 23rd, 2010


what is love
for you and me
is it a flower, is it set at our feet
does it ring at the heavens
or does it bellow out like smoke
thicker then hell, or louder a bell
what is our love!
is it something to throw!
is it something to gun down!!
is it something TO FUCKING KILL!!!!
is it delicate, is it soft...
can it be warm and yet cool.
does it show it self to us,
can it be caught by me or you.
is love but a figment
OF OUR FUCKING IMAGINATION!!!!
is it a feeling inside that grows like a kitten...
DOES IT RIP OUT YOUR HEART AND STOMP ON YOUR CHEST!!!!
does it make you feel warm inside, make you feel .. blessed...
can it be controlled?
CAN IT BE TETHERED!!!
can it be lashed
CAN IT BE TAKEN CARE OF!!!
what is love. to you or to me.
is it a breath.
a song
to you from me

a poem by eric MCGOWAN


Posted by tox - February 14th, 2010


gonna hang me in the morning
before the night be done
gonna hang me in the morning
i aint ever gonna see the sun
.
when i was a young lad
my daddy taught me well
to hunt down every fugitive
to hunt every one of em down
.
but then one day
a man did come
he had a badge and uniform
he told to stop and leave them lone
or else i deal with his gun
.
i stared at him so long and hard
and then i grabbed my knife
why i did this i do not know
but a body was all that was left
.
now this mans friends they hunt me down
through the lands and of the seas
but they shall never catch me
for i am but a breeze
.
then one day they caught my draft
and trapped me in a hole
bullets flew
and people fell
i was proud for they were pale
.
but the man i killed before
his son he was there
and he raised his fathers gun to me
me in the cross hairs
.
out of lead i drew my knife
ready for the blood shed
50 feet stood between
my freedom and my life
.
this young lad he had waited long for such a time as this
i ran at him but he stood still
he fired and hit my chest
.
i was down and defeated now
my life before my eyes
he pulled me up and strapped me down
he put me into cuffs and binds
.
i awoke in this prison cell
the death hung in the air
calling for the next man to hang
many men be waiting here
.
gonna hang me in the morning
before the night be done
gonna hang me in the morning
i
aint
ever
gonna see the
sun


Posted by tox - December 7th, 2009


kill me here
and kill me there
tests scores all come at once
for when they do i will live no more
my parents ground me form my life
so kill me now
while you have a chance
when tomorrow comes and all is undone
the son is old
dead
gray and gone

test week is not all that fun... and i am getting to it.. but its kicking my ass hard core... to much studying to do... hence the kill me now... (i loose all my abilities to have fun anymore.) it all sucks... and my friends are not in school anymore and they cant see me since i am in test week.


Posted by tox - November 18th, 2009


poppies row and row
i see them sway
upon the graves
of bolder man than i

i never know
their pains
the sorrows
their lives
their loves
their loss

but here buried row on row
like a trophy for tomorrow
at home and in a different country
the the places they they were born

we all die the very same way
and people skills go away
but these memories will love on for ever
in the poppie i see before me

here i stand
not knowing
and caring
for they
gave their
lives for
us to
stay

they do not know me or you
bit gave their life for freedom to conclude
and never know their children and all their little wims
they will not breath or feel joy
they will never know the world or the places they they could have lived in
or their families joy for for they pray for rest of the soldier
that brought back a metal but not back a heart to place it on

all they know is to drill and die
and now they have a statue big and bold never shy
it tells the onlooker that this is life
how they took it and how theey were taken in a battle
and we gave it up for all to be showed
men lay silent by the guns they took up
and poppies all around
row on row
for us to see and them to grow

the pity is the fact that we see
only the simple poppie upon this white sea
the smell of the earth, the sound of birds in trees
the red under brush
bodies buried all around me
of greater men then I

the man that stands at the grave
and remember all those horrible days
is but a pawn in the greater sceem of life
the one that makes men drill and die,
he survived and his friends, they fell
the whistle made these men go over the wall
and at the enemy with hope and god
and win the war through guns and wars
bullets flying all around, explosion everywhere
ALL THE SOUND!!!

he survived
he lived
bullets
never could
hurt this man
but why?
why did
he live
why can
he still
stand

it is because they needed one last man
to tell their stories
to tell their hopes, to tell their dreams
to help them move on
to give it all up

but is there still a war
this man will never sleep
he is haunted by the memories of friends and foes
he killed to many to forget the sorrows
he has told so many tales
to families and friends
burned into his mind
are the horrors of those times

he shall not rest
until you take
upon your hearts the memories
of his fallen friends and enimies
and give thanks to them all
and their great sacrifice
for the statues that stand
in memory to these men
they gave up their children
their wives their lives

for this we give thanks, and to this we remember
the stories we take to heart
the dances we remember
the poems that we hear
and the pictures that we see,
for all of these poppies,
we remember.

.
survival of the poppies happens only in men that go forth from governments that fight each other it is faith that these men stands and fall that the war gods will pity them give release to their souls and pride to their lands, it is that hope that the men that fall will pave the way for men to come giving a path to the enemies hearts and a victory for their sons, and only upon the sea of white will the true honors of war be lived and forgotten for these men are stronger than i.
only they could make this poppie grow at their head stones.
the sea of red and white will stand forever in memory of the men that served our country.
they still stand on guard but they wound the earth, they are the men of legend, the men of a countries birth.


Posted by tox - November 10th, 2009


here i sit
and here i stay
i sit upon my perch and say
what a noise what a sound
these people i see all around
earplugs make me deaf you say
but to hear you is my quest this day
i sit opon this chair and pray
wondering about the sound i hear.
people people everywhere
sound a echo, with despair
what this noise really wants from you
is to be herd but not by you
herd in the ears in in the heart
emotion coming from every shout
PEOPLE NEED TO HEAR ALL OUT!!!
but they do not
no hearing
no feeling
nothing
i sit apon this chair today
wondering when the day will come
i find another person that listens to emotion and shout
if such a day ever did exist then whoa is me and my bliss
for me u are deff to the true sound in your ears
but with my earplugs in.
i hear all
your breath. your soul. your tears.
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
and a bit of techno too. XD